Friday, September 18, 2009

Belly Rubbing Goodness

Samil just talked to me for a half hour on getting a Ph. D in English Education, with twenty five of those minutes spend looking in our window and watching himself rub his belly while rambling. This might be some sort of pre-party ritual for him as he just left to go to a party, a pajama party actually. That shouldn't surprise you, I guess, since you aren't here in the apartment. If you were here in the apartment, you'd say "that's weird, I could have sworn Samil was wearing jeans when he left." You, dear readers, would not have been mistaken because Samil did decide to wear jeans to a pajama party. He was, and I quote "not going to spend [his] Friday, after wearing dress pants all week, wearing anything but jeans."

Also, this conversation was unique this week because it didn't involve Samil figuratively or literally cornering me to talk. Twice this week we had extended conversations where I had no possible escape from. I wish I could tell you what we talked about in the first one, but to be honest, I spent the entire conversation going "yeah?" "oh" and "interesting" while I read a magazine on my exercise bike. This conversation went on for exactly 14 minutes because I was timing my workout and it ended when I got off the bike and went into the shower. Have you ever talked to someone for 14 minutes where the person didn't respond with more than a word at a time?

The second conversation was a pretty diverse one, but generally centered around Samil trying to rearrange the world to make things easier for him. For example, he thinks we need to rewrite the Constitution because he finds Delaware annoying and they shouldn't have so many members of Congress. Ditto all those big states out West. They're in his way. Also, he wants our President to essentially give up on the health care fight and not pass any legislation and try this again in two years. For some reason he thinks this is a good idea - I tried to figure out why so I could tell all of you, but all I got was some stammering and teeth sucking.

Also, Samil wants to legalize pot. This is not surprising. He wants to legalize pot for two reasons: 1) it would generate tax revenue for social programs and 2) it will get him laid. To his credit, I do think I learned in algebra II that:

Samil + Marijuana + Public Places + Hot Ladies = Samil + Hot Ladies + Apartment - Clothes

(If you simplify that equation, it looks like this:

Marijuana + Public Places = Apartment - Clothes

In other words, getting high in public is the same as being naked in your apartment, which I find hysterical for some reason)

This may become a recurring theme, but yesterday when I got home from work, Samil was sitting on the couch reading Vanity Fair (aside, I didn't know people actually bought and read Vanity Fair - I thought it was the sort of magazine that people just talked about without reading. who knew) with the two rolling chairs in the living room facing him. On one chair was his container of soy milk, and the other a cereal box, as if he had been having a round table discussion with his breakfast foods.

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