Wednesday, March 24, 2010

The Girlfriend (?) Part Five

Quick reminder for you all.... this is not fiction.  I swear.

We had last week off, minus half a day on Monday.  Our city ended up having TERRIBLE flooding, so we couldn't work.  

Samil basically loved this.  I'd relate to you an extended conversation we had where I explained to him that he couldn't advocate that education is in a crisis and also not finding the missed days to be important, but it’s a really boring story.

On the Thursday, I decided to investigate our broken couch (casualty of the party the week before) and put together a makeshift fix in for the moment by propping up the wood that cracked.  The couch is in bad shape, and will need extensive surgery.  The main support beam across the back is essentially cracked all the way through.  I hope you all keep it in your prayers.  After propping up the couch, Samil sat on it and then pondered whether the temporary fix would affect the couch's usefulness for hooking up.  I explained to him that the couch was broken and he shouldn't be making out on it.  He didn't seem to understand.  It is possible that in my next post I will be telling you all how I chased him and Nancy off the couch late one night after hearing them enjoying our sick friend/furniture too much.  

Friday, Samil's plan was to head into the city with Nancy.  My plan was to sit around and shoot aliens.  As he was leaving, he told me "I'm going to bring this sweatshirt.  I don't know if I'll need it, but I'm going to bring it anyway."  And then just left, leaving me wondering if I was supposed to offer advice or praise on the matter.  More importantly, he didn't tell me what he told me the next morning.

I ended up having some insomnia that night and got very little sleep.  Samil got less, coming in after I finally passed out and waking up around the same time.  He sort of stumbled into the living room (where I was back to shooting aliens), and then gave me an awkward smile with his hands folded in front of him.  The only way I can describe the smile is akin to when a child is attempting to be positive after a drunken redneck ran over his puppy in a pickup truck...

Samil: "So, I can't hang out with Nancy today."
Me: "Oh, what’s up?"
S: "Well, she got a virus and she was throwing up so much her esophagus detached from her stomach."
M: "Huh?"
S: "Yeah, and well, she's okay now, but she has to take some medicine and she doesn't want to leave the house."
M: "Oh, that sucks."
S: "Yeah - I'm gonna beat that guy up that gave it to her.  Stupid customer."
M: "Why don't you bring her some soup or something?  Make her feel better."
S: "She said she just wants to be by herself and sleep.  I asked but she said she didn't want that."
M: "Oh.  That sucks."
S: "What's wrong with me?  I'm really worked up over this."
M: "Well, you like her and stuff, but you know, shit happens.  You'll see her soon."
S: "Yeah, but... I'm tearing up here.  What's wrong with me?!"

And then he walked back to bed.  

Let's review.  Samil did not hang out with Nancy because she had a DETACHED ESOPHAGUS.  He's now emotionally distraught over this like a middle school boy upset the first girl that let him smile at her now won't talk to him.  After about 5 weeks of seeing each other intermittently.  Based on this conversation I arrived at a few possible conclusions...

1) Nancy has the worst luck in the world.
2) Nancy is really bad at getting out of a relationship
3) Nancy is REALLY cruel and very hysterical when she ends relationships.

I mean.... does that even fucking happen?  How does your esophagus detach from your stomach?  And, if it does happen, wouldn't you die?  Or at least go to the hospital?  How come I've never heard of the genius doctor that came up with the pill to REATTACH YOUR ESOPHAGUS to your stomach?  

When Samil finally woke up, he wrote a fiction story for 3 hours as therapy to explore his emotions, and he then finally came to the conclusion that she's ill and things like this happen.  That's good for him, and I'm glad he returned to Planet Reality.

Still, for a few days, Samil was a little bummed out that he didn't get to see his middle school sweetheart Nancy.  We were bumming around Monday night and he left her a message just saying he wanted to chat.  Then, as he was heading to bed, she called and he took the call in his bedroom.  I (surprise surprise) continued killing aliens for an hour or so and then started getting ready for bed.  As I was organizing my room he poked his head in the door and said "So, it was a scratched esophagus."

"Oh, well that's good.  And makes sense."
"Yeah.  I was sort of wondering why she wasn't like... in the hospital."

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